As I was ploughing through Holmes (1995) this afternoon, I came across this paragraph: "Many men apparently do not understand women's need for 'connection' through talk in intimate relationships...While women prefer to talk through problems, seeking solutions or acceptable compromises, men prefer to avoid conflict and keep silent; when things are going well, women tend to express this through on-going interaction and communicative exchanges, while men tend to see less need for regular talk in established intimate relationships." And then, a random memory suddenly struck...
I've not really paid much attention to it, yet wilfully labelled it "the shut up song" when I first heard it in a friend's car one night.
It was the year 1999.
Recently, I listened, for the first time, to the words of the song carefully, and marvelled at how beautifully written it was. And, I realise how the song actually epitomises many linguistic research on gender communicative styles.
I've not really paid much attention to it, yet wilfully labelled it "the shut up song" when I first heard it in a friend's car one night.
It was the year 1999.
Recently, I listened, for the first time, to the words of the song carefully, and marvelled at how beautifully written it was. And, I realise how the song actually epitomises many linguistic research on gender communicative styles.
2 comments:
"When you say nothing at all"?
I absolutely love that song... its sooooo beautiful...so tat one...so no need to say.
Jus like wat you always muse abt how you wld like to have frens who can be there, not say a thing, might have had the best conversation...
"The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch swing with, never say a word, then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation that you ever had."
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